Thursday, March 30, 2006

how to get more female scientists...

yes, another blatant reposting and repackaging of some pretty good material. this is kinda relevant based on an LA Times article today (see title link). I should mention that I got this from a google cache and it is not currently available live (AFAIK) enjoy!:

July 26, 2005 PM
The Depp Conspiracy by Aaron Voorhees

For Immediate Release: New Public Relations Director for Science announced. Yes, this may come as a shock for many of you, but I have officially nominated and voted myself in for the position. Already, I have designed up such ad campaigns as: “Science: Girls Get in Free”, “Science invented Rock & Roll”, and “Math - the Gateway Drug.”

You may be wondering what right a literature geek has to this title. “A man with the math and science skills of a trained poodle marketing science, pshaw” you may be muttering to your spouse or newspaper reading companion. Good for you I say, a sound observation. Let us take the hypothesis that I, like most Americans, am about as interested in Science as I am in soccer. As in, I like the uniforms and the concept, but I do not really dabble in it or even watch it that often. Can we change this law of science? Probably not. However, through clever advertising I aim to change this trend in America’s social science.
First, myself or one of my clever staff members need to write a clever screenplay about Galileo and get Johnny Depp to play the title role. This will fit in with my theory that Johnny Depp can make anything seem cool and that once he plays a dashing scientist that all the attractive women on the planet will begin to think hanging out in a laboratory is romantic and that lab coats are sexy.
The next test for our scientific method is to talk Sarah Vowel, or some other literate master, into writing a book about the history of one of the great Greek or Indian female scientists. Forget about the DaVinci Code and its holy grail quest. Let us see the New York Times Best Seller list when people realize that science was the godmother of religious scandal.
You may be wondering why such the fuss to get Americans back into science. Well, one day on an intelligent talk show I heard that the chance of the next Einstien coming from America are almost nil. That India had the best chance in the future. Not that I have any problems with India, but I would like to think that we could at least make a run for such an honorary title.
Now, as I go back to school to get my teaching credential, I want to someday be able to say, “2005, yes, that was the year I stopped caring so much about politics and started campaigning for Science.” Of course there is a good chance I will get fired from my self-appointed position, but if you think that is going to stop me from putting my foot in my mouth, then think again. Because I will keep on blindly cheerleading for science at least until next week when I put it on the back bunsen burner in order to play croquet with some college girls.
Hmmm. Historical aside here: Theano was the wife of Pythagoras and ran his school after his untimely death. She is credited with writing the treatise on the Golden Mean. Theano was born c. 546 B.C. which is many generations before Aristotle and his Golden Mean ethical treatise. Maybe this book or screenplay should have Johhny Depp, or I mean Galileo, travel back in time to meet the alluring Theano at a croquet match. Yes, you are correct, it was not invented yet. It will be a dream sequence.
Go ahead, start calling for my resignation. The good thing about being self-appointed; Nobody can vote you out.