fear and trembling: the ethical question

Kierkegaard's book analyzes the old testament story of Abraham and Issac. basically God told Abraham to murder his son, an indefensible, unjustified and unethical command with which he complied.

the fact that at the last moment God said "stop, I was just testing you" is irrelevant. Abraham was carrying out an act of murder and so had accepted that mindset. this submission to a perception of something greater than oneself is a scary, recognized, human trait. note "Islam" in english directly translates to "submission".

so, when God is on the line, do you take the call? have him leave a message? remember that avoidance is still a decision and if the issue is important, non-action is as serious as any action that you do...

I heard a disturbing story on "This American Life" recently. in it Alex Kotlowitz interviews a woman whose abusive father probably killed someone. she reported her suspicions to the police, but the detectives didn't pursue the matter. she let it go -- even though the guilt of not acting forcefully enough and following up with the police ate at her. years later, a review of the cold case resulted in a conviction -- of the wrong man. he spent years in prison until somehow the woman heard about him and she finally came forward with what she knew. he considers her his angel, but she still feels terrible about it.

...cut to my dream last night. I'm at work and get a phone call from a stranger -- maybe it's a wrong number, I don't know. he wants me to go meet him at the police station in 5 minutes - he needs a witness and is afraid for his life. I have no idea what is going on. he insists he needs me so the police don't beat him or shoot him. what can I do? what should I do? hang up? sorry, wrong number? I don't want to get involved? it sounds very important; my decision could have life impacting consequences.
I think...
"on what basis and with what justification are you asking this request, and how is it that you are asking this request of me and not someone else?" of course, the answers to these questions may not be enough to make the right decision... we should in any case know ourselves well enough to be prepared to make the choice. you may be selfish, you may be foolish or mixed up or even consider yourself wise and caring; whatever you honestly are, you must admit to yourself.

Bob Dylan said "you gotta serve someone". personally, I think I serve many masters. in the end they all boil down to one, but who's to say that end is ever reached?

our educational system...

"Creative minds have always been known to survive any kind of bad training." - Anna Freud

just a quote I thought to throw out to let you know I was around :)

Toys for Justice

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nature pics

I have a new flickr account and picked some of my recent favorite shots to share.
see them here

my body is working...

one of the things I like about weekends is sleeping in -- you get time to lay in bed relaxed and mind cleared of most of the banal distractions. anyway, I can think better. this past week I was occupied with plenty of activities: saw the Body Worlds exhibit in LA, sold a vehicle, bought a new car, went on a business trip and dealt with airport travel, group dynamics and new surroundings. with all this behind me, and finally some quiet thinking time, I could digest some of the inputs. focus is a quality to be exploited. so what are the learning activities that, given time, I should like to pursue? I am driven towards becoming a musician. strange, considering how handicapped I feel in that area. nonetheless, I am compelled and will start lunchtime guitar practice soon. my goal there is to learn "pride and joy" as the late SRV (Stevie Ray Vaughn) played it. if I get good enuf, someday I may be a real street musician!
secondly, I've resumed my artistic (drawing, painting) pursuits. I've found pastels to be a good medium for learning - challenging, but quick and cheap. I've liked working from photographs but that is a bit of a crutch. on my recent trip to Chico, I was in Birdwell park without a camera. I wonder what mental impressions I have of that place that can be transferred to paper?

so these are some things I do "for the sake of which" I become more of the self I am pursuing. that concept bears more explanation, but I won't go into that now. instead, I'll just expose a little dialog from that excellent philosophical filem "waking life" (it's a little bit relevant, ok?):

Boat Car Guy - Ahoy there matey, you in for the long haul? You need a little hitch in your get along, a little lift on down the line?
Wiley Wiggins - Oh yeah, actually I was waiting for a cab or something but, uh, if you want to...
Boat Car Guy - Alright, don't miss the boat.
Wiley Wiggins - Hey, thanks.
Boat Car Guy - Not a problem. Anchors away! So what do you think of my little vessel? She's what we call see-worthy. S-E-E, see with your eyes. I feel like my transport should be an extension of my personality. Voila. And this, this is like my little window to the world and every minute's a different show. Now, I may not understand it, I may not necessarily agree with it, but I'll tell you what, I accept it, just sort of glide along. You want to keep things on an even keel, I guess it's what I'm saying, you want to go with the flow. The sea refuses no river. The idea is to remain in a state of constant departure while always arriving. Saves on introductions and good byes. The ride does not require an explanation, just occupants, that's where you guys come in. It's like you come onto this planet with a crayon box. Now you may get the eight pack, you may get the sixteen pack, but it's all in what you do with the crayons, the colors that you're given. And don't worry about drawing within the lines or coloring outside the lines, I say color outside the lines, you know what I mean? Color right off the page. Don't box me in. We're in motion to the ocean. We are not landlocked, I'll tell you that. So, where do you want out?
Wiley Wiggins - Uh, who me? Am I first? Uh, I don't know really. Anywhere is fine.
Boat Car Guy - Well, just, just, give me an address or something okay?
Wiley Wiggins - Uhhhh...
Other Guy in Car - Tell you what, go up three more streets, take a right, go two more blocks, drop this guy off on the next corner.
Wiley Wiggins - Where's that?
Boat Car Guy - Well, I don't know either but it's somewhere and it's going to determine the course of the rest of your life. All ashore that's going ashore. Ha, ha, ha. Dooo dooo!

(thanks to for from www.silywily.com/wakinglife.html for the quote).

btw, I think I am a eight pack crayon box :)

the world beats a path to my door of perception...

I've nothing more to add now, but will come up with something clever shortly my friends! in the meantime, try "indicating the formal aspects of the idea of existence"...

on an unrelated note, when you're in my neighborhood, I recommend the bbq pork pho at pho tay bak. it's places like this that make so cal an international food fest :)

Obama is not Usama!

no, he's not even a Muslim. of course now that I've planted that idea, you're associating our next president with a terrorist. oops, I did it again. I'm such a tool for HRC :)

more realistically, I'm thinking of comparisons of Obama with Jimmy Carter. both were good speakers promising the kind of change that only an outsider can do. seems to be a winning combination!

actually, to me personally, these matters are trifling. as a practicing phronimos, my concern is to do the appropriate thing in every situation I find myself. I didn't vote in the primary because I truthfully had more important things to attend. the old slogan "think globally, act locally" applies here.

speaking of the Clintons, what has been occupying my time lately is deep analytical studies in philosophy of the phenomenological, ontological, existential sort -- I'm reminded of when Bill discussed the meaning of 'is' as I've been learning Heideggerian (what is 'being') via podcasts by UC Berkeley philosophy prof Bert Dreyfus. I am again a student!

on that note, let me close with some key dialog from the wonderful flick "Across the Universe":

Dad: "Be serious, Max. What do you actually intend to do with your life?..."
Max: "...why isn't the issue here who I am?"
Uncle: "Because Maxwell, what you do defines who you are."
Max: "Who you are defines what you do."
Jude: "Surely, it's not what you do, but its the way that you do it."

think of this when Barack get's into his vision thing...